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A Dysfunctional Family of Five Reviews...Cinderella Man!
Knowing that Russell Crowe has an alleged tendency to physically attack critics, we took extreme measures to ensure the security and privacy of the Family for this review.
 Sis: Hey, that creep locked us in the theater! Hey! HEY! What're you doing?!
 Mom: Honey, don't worry. It's to protect us in case Russell Crowe goes into some Down Under berserker rage over our review. I told DeadBrain I'd turn myself over to Russell in order to save the rest of you, but they weren't buying it.
 Bro: Hey! They forgot the candy! Hey! HEY!!! [His shouts escalated into a full-blown panic attack, during which he ran directly into the theater's screen, which didn't rip, as it does in the movies. Instead, he knocked himself unconscious on the brick wall behind the screen.]
 Dad: You think he'll be okay if he stays out for a couple hours? We might have a chance to watch a movie without interruption, for once in a blue moon.
 Baby: It's a good movie, but it's not for everyone. There's a lot of boxing in it, and the punches didn't sound like noises they were making by smashing a tomato. Boy, could I use a cuddle.
 Verdict: Big screen, though you'll feel better about the money if it's a matinee, or if you wait a couple weeks to use the discounted passes.
Seen the Trailer Reviews at BBspot.com yet? Get the jump on what's coming to theaters (and game consoles) from Brian Briggs and his fabulous Reviewinator!
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