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| You are lounging next to: Home > Entertainment | August 20th |
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 American Midol: Lies, Dang Lies, and James FreyJan 20 2006 by Lani Voivod
Do you believe everything I say in this column?When I say a souped-up vacuum is the object of my deepest desires, do you question it? If I suggest I'm indifferent about "The Unfortunate Weight Gain of 2005" (as it has come to be named in our household), do you call my bluff? If I state that we girls talk REALLY dirty about you, our exploits with you, and the details of your natural endowments (or lack thereof), do you doubt my sincerity? (Better not...) What if I ALSO made it clear to you through intense repetition that I'm an Alcoholic, a Drug Addict, and a Criminal. Would you finally question my scruples? If you had any sense you would. And even if he was hitting the crack pipe HARD, so would James Frey, author of the instant cult-classic A Million Little Pieces. Still peeved about Mr. Frey's autobiographical wanderlust? Get over it. Here's why. And here's some chaw to chew: What if Frey planted the untruths, banking on a second round of killer publicity? And the BEST kind, too: Free, with dollops of Controversy, garnished with the hallowed Man-Against-Snooty-Establishment mystique? Could a drunk, crack-smokin' criminal be so calculating? Does the Pope like stale wafers? Writer Barbara "Babs" Goodwin said it best when she intoned: "Who among us...has never embellished/lied to the point of admiration? S***, for me it's a cottage industry." Right you are, Babs. James – Let the truthmongers scour police logs and instruction manuals. Your fib-infused fodder suits me just fine. Merci! Enjoyed this American Midol column? Or diabolically incensed by its uselessness? Either way, you're invited to check out all of Lani Voivod's Midol spasms right here. Wanna sound off on this subject? Send your feedback to comments@deadbrain.com! Related Articles American Midol: Vis-à-vis the Show That (Sort of) Inspired This Column Jan 18 2006
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