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Bush Administration Refuses to Kiss and Tell on Katrina
Citing confidentiality privileges as emperor given to him by the Constitution, President Bush has refused to turn over some documents about Hurricane Katrina or make top White House officials available for testimony before Congressional committees investigating the government's response to the storm.
"If we don't keep the information the president received in regard to Katrina confidential, that would limit his ability to ignore crucial advice about horrible catastrophes in the future," said deputy White House spokesmodel Trent Duffy.
Duffy noted that there are countless possible natural disasters threatening America such as a massive earthquake striking Los Angeles, a mega-tornado hitting Dallas, or Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie giving birth to an ugly child, and that Congress "should mind their own beeswax" and give Bush a free hand if they expect him and his staff to perform the same "heckuva job" they did on New Orleans.
"There has been a near total lack of cooperation that has made it impossible for us to do a thorough investigation," said Democratic Senator Joseph Lieberman of Connecticut through a spokesman. The senator would have made the statement in public himself, said the spokesman, but Lieberman was in traction in Yale-New Haven Hospital for damage inflicted to his spine by actually taking a principled stand against the president.
Duffy defended the White House efforts to aid the investigation, noting that it had released thousands of pages of documents related to Katrina, including former FEMA head Michael Brown's e-mails detailing his dinner plans and wardrobe selection.
Yet even Senator Susan Collins, Republican of Maine, objected when administration officials who were not even part of the president's staff refused to testify about communications with the White House. "We can't even get access to his frickin' dog, let alone [Chief of Staff] Andrew Card," said an exasperated Collins.
"That's an outright falsehood," Duffy responded. "The president has made it clear that Barney, a trusted member of his inner circle, has been cleared to testify - under oath - before any Congressional body that asks."
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