Our Super Colossal Democratic Convention Coverage!
Jul 27 2004 by Allen Voivod
Welcome to DeadBrain.com, where you are about to receive the most complete satirical coverage of the Democratic National Convention.
Just like the Convention itself, we've got a ridiculously long list of events happening during the next few days, and we're going to give you a sneak preview. Right now!
The crown jewel in our coverage has to be Douglass Ramssmullett, president of the International Satirists Guild. We've secured exclusive access to the trade coalition leader's insight and analysis from the floor of the Convention throughout the week.
Also on the roster is Freedom Ferret, who, we recently discovered, is a huge fan of haiku. He'll be sharing his poetic musings on the convention when inspiration strikes. (We expect it to strike often, Mr. Ferret. You hear?)
Additionally, we'll be providing daily coverage of Jon Stewart and The Daily Show's coverage of the Democratic Convention, which begins July 27th. After all, they're the most important news source EVER, so we'll be giving them a closer look this week. How close? Close enough to see the peach fuzz, baby.
Finally, we're in talks to get the generally apolitical Dysfunctional Family of Five to step out of their movie review shoes and offer a review of the Convention after all the balloons have fallen and popped and scared the crap out of people in fear of a terrorist attack.
It's going to be an exciting week, and we hope you're here with us for it!