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| You have been disturbed by: Home > Sport | August 30th |
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Whew! America Saved from Mickey Rooney's Bare BunsJan 8 2005 by Greg Kuhl
Millions across America breathed a collective sigh of relief after the Fox television network rejected a proposed Super Bowl advertisement that featured 84-year-old Mickey Rooney's bare bottom in a sauna.But Fox's decision brought two questions to the forefront: The first question is still up for debate, but, yes, Rooney is still alive - much to the surprise of a large segment of the general public. Or at least he appeared to be when he was wrapped in a towel in a commercial for an over-the-counter cold medicine. Fox said the Janet Jackson breast brouhaha and subsequent $550,000 fine in last year's Super Bowl had absolutely nothing to do with its decision to reject the ad featuring Rooney. But there were other, practical considerations. "It saved untold millions of people untold millions of dollars in therapy bills for the rest of their lives," said Fox Sports spokesman Lou d'Ermilio. "Could you imagine the mental picture, the horror that Super Bowl viewers would carry with them to see the bare behind of an 84-year-old washed-up actor? It's just not something that Fox management could have on its conscience. And, yes, we do have a conscience - sometimes." Rooney said he was devastated by the decision, adding "This was my chance to appeal to a whole new audience. Let's face it, I'm a little over the hill as far as my acting career is concerned - except for the roles that require doting or crazy great-grandfathers. "I figured that my butt was at least as appealing as Janet Jackson's…nah, no way it is. But I figured this gig would allow an entire new generation to see that I still have it, that I'm not a has-been." Rooney said he looked at the ad, which cost $1.2 million for a 30-second spot, as a "Nicollette Sheridan-Desperate Housewives towel-dropping scene for the older generation. "What's wrong with that? Can't an old man enjoy his remaining years, have a little fun and make a little cash?" Rooney asked sadly. "I guess not."
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